Inspired by real life events.
The wind blew at me with vengeance. I take this as a sign and smile to myself. So many times, I wanted to come here in the last weeks and then I always postponed it. I brush my hair out of my face, close my umbrella and put it in the case. The weather today is almost autumnal. Everything is grey and sleepy. All day long I have been thinking about it. I just couldn’t let it go. I look around the room. It smells homely. It’s well known that fragrances encourage people to buy, but I can’t imagine that they use this marketing trick here. And if they do, it’s pretty clever. It smells homey, like cookies or something. Vanilla. Soft music comes out of the speakers, melodic house music, with children’s laughter played in places. Very sweet. The interior is simple and yet seems well chosen. Very well planned.
The lady behind the counter is currently talking to a couple and I use the waiting time to look at the notices and flyers. I read with interest about the association’s work with the children and additional projects that have been developed: grief counselling, dealing with the authorities, looking after residential groups or individuals, family management, day-care centres etc. The little smiling faces encourage me in my decision. This is how it should be. Unencumbered or at least easy. I had already informed myself about it online and am now even more convinced that I am at the right address. The couple says goodbye to her and nods to me. I return the greeting and am warmly welcomed by the caregiver. She asks what my request is and then takes a lot of time to tell me more about the tasks. To me all this sounds very exciting and worthwhile. Over a warming cup of tea in the cosy sitting area she tells me about her work and shows me the latest reports of the association.
We were chatting and it got late. The shutters automatically roll down on the windows and now no longer reveal the inside of the business premises.
“Oh, it’s so late. Well, that got us chatting. Please wait a moment, I’ll just lock the door as a precaution,” she apologizes and leaves the key in the lock.
Only a few moments later she is back. The woman is really enchanting, and I can wonderfully imagine how much she loves her pupils. She radiates so much warmth and goodness. Now she introduces me to her heart projects in more detail and tells me about a little girl who was newly accepted into the group. On her mobile phone she has photos of her and the new “siblings”. The little mouse has been through a lot and does not speak at the moment. Her name is Isabella. I am very touched by the story of this girl. So, it is finally decided.
While I fill the contact form with false data, I assure her that my husband and I will discuss the matter and arrange a new appointment with her. She disappears in the back for a moment and is out of sight. I click on the confirmation on my display, jump up, grab a felt-tip pen from reception and scribble quickly on the envelope. She will do this for me, I’m sure. I grab my coat and my umbrella, put on my bag, quickly unlock the door and I’m off. My car is ready just a few yards around the corner, the app shows me. I quickly run there through the pouring rain and am soaking wet despite my umbrella. The certainty of having done something good warms my innermost and I can’t wait to tell you about it.
“Good evening, signora, he’s waiting. “
The owner himself welcomes me warmly, takes my coat and umbrella, hands everything to his assistant and leads me to your table. I was very much looking forward to the evening with you and getting ready at home for our date. All the arrangements have been made. Everything you like. I wore the dark blue dress from that night at the hotel on purpose. I’m aware that the top shows more than is appropriate for “the Italian,” I only care about you. As always. You watch with relish as the men in the dining room gaze at my breasts and probably can’t believe that they can discover my nipples through the lace fabric. I also feel the women who are with them. The devastating looks.
My skirt swings and swings around my thighs and my perfume wraps me in a seductively fragrant cloud. You gave me that perfume and you love it on me. I smile at you on the way and wink at you cheekily. You laugh and shake your head. When I get to the table, you get up. Your hand briefly caresses my waist.
You kiss me and then whisper to me: “Hanna, if you wanted to drive everyone here crazy, you’ve succeeded.”
I grin and look up at you with a challenge. “Everyone?”
You understand immediately and nod with a smile. “Yes, babe, everybody. You look great.” You’re whispering in my ear, “I love the way your nipples look through the top. You’re beautiful and I want to put you on the table right now and take you.”
I get the creeps. Your effect is still the same. I melt in your presence. But I don’t show it to you so obviously anymore. You asked me to meet you, and I only agreed to it because I see a chance. A chance for a new beginning. You’ve made it clear that you think we’ve made a connection with last night. But I can’t do it like this. You’re gonna have to earn my trust back. It takes time. And I need you to understand that.
Your hand caresses my butt as we sit down in our seats. You got your table, of course. A bit out of the way of most guests and not quite so visible. You pour me wine and solemnly hand me the glass.
“To us, Hanna.”
I seize the moment and say, “To our new beginning.”
You hesitate briefly, but then nod and repeat my sentence. We look deep into each other’s eyes and it seems – for the first time since we met – that you don’t really know what’s going on inside me.
The clinking of our glasses dissolves the co…